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Bear Claws, Jimmy Kimmel, and Our First Cousin. Who Is NOT Incest.


Wasn’t going to post today . . . was going to eat peanut butter cereal and make mica-free mineral makeup and milk all day while watching some Wentworth Miller on this show that made me want to try out incarceration . . . a true ode-to-productivity day, yeah! . . . but what are twinks to do when their first cousin, part-time baby nurse, full-time funny and stand-up (comedian) gal talks about the practice of stuffing babies into multi-pocketed vests and incestuous tendencies in Iceland?Read more »

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Jesus Rises and Crap Falls Onto My Chest (Week 5)



Last night went something like this:

Mommy: [Daddy], did you know babies have growth spurts at about this time?

Daddy: Oh yeah?

Mommy: Yeah. Babies cry a lot during them. But not ours, right? He barely cries. We’re so lucky. So so lucky.

Daddy made a sleep sound in agreement.

You, on the other hand, as if on cue, flashed your baby blues open and, get this, started wailing. You, wailing. Wailing. And wailing.Read more »

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This is (Sur)Real Life (Week 3)



There’s light at the end of the I-can’t-tell-day-from-night tunnel. Her name is Grandma. For three solid days (right, days?) she made our humble abode clean enough that we could, like, slurp the best whey protein shakes everrrrr I’ve been making off the floor and lap water from the toilets. She also swayed and shushed and cooed you to sleep a few or hundred times while I napped a few feet away. Of course Gma is on my list of People Whom I’m Not Fake Smiling at When They Hold Little Man, As I Genuinely Trust Them, but I can’t really stand not being an arm’s length from you.Read more »

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